"Even in the dark the ship will go to its destination."

There was a middle - aged woman who had been born in Moscow and had spent her youth there. While in Russia she had had a dream which she related with much emotion. 

In the dream she was led to a sailing ship by a luminous man; it was a black night, and the ship set sail in a boundless sea. She was afraid. Then another man, whose face she saw very clearly, said to her, "There is no fear. Even in the dark the ship will go to its destination." Her fear left, and she awoke". For many years thereafter she had searched in vain for that face in both Russia and England. 

Then in October of 1895 she attended Swamiji's lecture at Prince's Hall, and there He was, the man in her dream.

In 1985 at Kanyakumari i remember hearing about six volumes of 'New Discoveries' by Marie Louis Burke but hadn't paid much attention to it. Reading 6 books seemed to be a task next to impossible. There was so much to be read and Karmayoga being the main theme of our life in Vivekananda Kendra, it was difficult but not impossible. Well, the year 2004 has been a turning point again.

On 4th January 2007 Sudhir passed away and suddenly there was a void. Didn't know what to do? Why to earn money as the reason for earning had ended. The routine of serving him day & night, cooking, leaving home at 5 a.m. for yoga sessions, worrying about how to make the two ends meet had suddenly vanished. 

I left my job at Kanakia's RBK International School because they needed me there full time and wanted me to sign the 3 year bond. I was not mentally ready to be bound again...life with Sudhir was a 12 year bondage and it was enough now. I needed to give more time to my mother. 

Aai started taking me out of Mumbai every month. In March we went to Belur, Dakshineshwar, Sarada Math, Kamarpukur - Jairambati and all the related places in Kolkata. Don't remember when but i promised Yogaprana Mataji that i shall speak on the 'New Discoveries'. Initially i didn't have my own set of these volumes but later Mataji gifted me all the volumes.

Can you believe dear friends that on 17th July 2011 i will be completing the VI volume at the Spiritual Retreat in Sarada Math, Pune. The best part of the lectures on these books is after reading it in English i would speak in Marathi. And the worst part of it is i don't have any notes because i wrote none. Though till date i haven't had a chance to speak in English yet.

Four years have passed and it is like 'Vrata Saangta' now. Cannot yet comprehend that have finished reading all volumes. Thanks to my mother who instilled this liking to read and developed a habit of reading and then also of discussing with her about what was read.

All these years while i was reading the New Discoveries, whoever was next to me at home or in office or in journey had to compulsorily hear about Swamiji.

All the time i would be in awe of what i was reading. I could see myself as a speck of dust and become witness to every thing happening in HIS life. Day and night , in my breath & my dreams, in my food & my thoughts, every iota of second was filled with only Swamiji. 

Like the story with which i started today about the Russian lady even my life has become-

 .......All fear has left, and even in the dark the ship is moving towards destination...!!!